it's been days. i missed writing here.
andami kong gustong ikwento, from the happenings of saturday night to the happenings of last night, pero sisimulan ko na lang sa nararamdaman ko ngayon.
i badly need a cigarette. a break. someone to save me.
a christmas jump-upper. a beautiful happy gift. an insulin shot. a text message from someone i miss so damn much. but let's not even go there.
naiinis lang ako dahil pasko na pero hindi ko pa rin maramdaman. hindi naman ako ganito dati. naiinis din ako dahil hindi na healthy ang growing annoyance ko over an indie (indiehan) film project that i've committed myself to work for. naiinis ako dahil may nami-miss akong mga tao na hindi na dapat nami-miss, at for the first time in a long time hindi ko alam kung ano talaga ang gusto ko. naiinis ako dahil madali akong masaktan at lately ay nagiging madali na naman sa kin ang manakit. o ang maging insensitive at walang pakialam.
naiinis din ako dahil umiigsi na naman ang pasensya ko. dahil nagiging bitter-bile-beeyatch na naman ang moda ko ngayon, for reasons that i myself haven't figured out yet.
hay.
i badly need a cigarette. a big warm hug. a crying session with myself.
and then maybe i'll be ok again.
3 comments:
may panahon talagang ganyan! iiyak kung kailangan at magbakasyon kung nararapat!...dont forget to count your blessings and somehow it will ease up the inis thing...
It's not quite the same thing, but here's a big warm virtual {{{hug}}}.
Hope you figure out what's bothering you soon.
thanks guys! :-) despite the "inis" factor lately alam kong mas marami pa rin akong dapat ikasaya kesa ikabwisit. hehe. merry christmas. :-)
Post a Comment