AT WALA AKONG PAKE

ngumakngak kayo dyan nang ngumakngak. ke may punto kayo o wala, wala na akong pake.
bago pa kayo nadismaya, nauna na ako sa inyo.
pero wag kayong mag-alala, bibitaw din kayo. dahil matagal na rin akong bumitaw at sa puntong ito gusto ko na lang talagang matapos. sana lang bumitaw na lang kayo kapag pebrero na. pero kung bibitaw na kayo ngayon, bahala kayo.

don't email or tweet me your feedback. i can't do anything about them. we can't do anything about them anymore. it's finished, it's in the can, the things you're seeing now. nakita ko tong darating, itong punto na ito in fairness.  no one is faultless, because we're a team. no one is faultless, not even the bosses, or the direks. ako rin, may kakulangan, dahil nung nagkakaipitan na sa deadlines, pinangalawa ko na lang sa priority ko ang quality. nang hindi ko na solo ang paggawa ng bahay, bumitaw na rin ako by 40%. dahil feeling ko kasi, there it goes. the story is over, there's not much to tell anymore.

ang issue nyo, walang conflict. i was thinking the same thing when i was writing those eps set in ilocos. but then, sabi nga ng immediate na kinauukulan- yung ang gusto nila e. puro kilig. mahirap talaga kapag ginagawa mo lang ang ginagawa mo dahil trabaho mo ito. yun ang nararamdaman ko sa kanya. i cared about the story, pero matagal na kong hindi nagke-care. hindi ko masikmura ang puro kilig at walang conflict. so now we get these feedback. and i realize na tama ang pakiramdam ko. kapag walang conflict, walang kwento. walang kwenta.

but i'm grateful, for an 8-week (airing-wise, 12) love story that i can truly say i'm proud of. and for those 8 (or 12) weeks alone, this show will always be special to me. C and L will always be special to me. C, specifically, because it was during those times when i was smitten by him that i was able to contribute the most sparkle to the material.

sabi nga ng bossing namin, iba ang lente ng isang babaeng lumalandi-- "papa ko si C. papa ko siya, at kilig ako sa kanya", referring to the director. it works the same for the writer, sir.  iba ang pluma ng babaeng lumalandi. for 12 weeks, i was smitten, in love, feeling 15 years old again. when realities reared their ugly heads at di na kinaya ng powers ko, the feelings faded, and that was when it became just another job to me.

so, right, gustoko na lang matapos to. WEEK 17 treatment due tomorrow. WEEK 17 script on wednesday. barrelling towards the end, walang makakapigil sa akin at wala akong pake kung anong isipin ng kahit sino bukod sa mga bossing ko.