final stretch

final stretch for the year, final stretch for our tv show.
i will miss both. knock on wood, i love my 2009. it was a year of beginnings and learnings. i hope the remaining days for this year will be as happy, if not happier, than my past 300 or so days. i pray. and thank lord so much. dahil yung mga natutunan at naranasan ko nung 2008, nagamit ko naman para tahakin ang 2009 in the best way that i could.

sobrang salamat lord. you saw me through, not only because i placed my absolute faith in you, but because i know na hindi nyo naman talaga ako pababayaan. siguro ganon lang talaga, kailangan mong maranasan ang malungkot para mas ma-appreciate mo ang masaya. kailangang maranasan ang wala para lalong i-value kung ano ang meron. kailangang mag-hit ng almost rock-bottom, kailangang umabot sa limbo, sa crossroads, sa state of being lost and directionless, para mahanap mo kung ano ang tamang path na makakabuti para sa yo at sa mga taong importante sa yo. year-end senti-ness. hehe.

wednesday ng gabi hanggang thursday ng hapon, marathon brainstorm kami for the last week of the show. kahapon lang din namin nalaman na last week na pala yon. akala kasi namin second-to-the-last. in a way relieved ako. kasi gusto kong mag-break kahit sandali lang. pero in a way, sayang din yung money from the supposed extra week. we're still ending on the same date (early january) pero siguro nakahanap sila ng paraan para ma-stretch ang mga scripts to til week 17. cost-cutting measures.

blessing ang show na to para sa kin. di ko sya makakalimutan. it was my first actual soap, my freshman project papasok sa career na ngayon ko lang talaga sineseryoso. at masaya ako dahil k@torse brought me so much. pride, dahil nakaka-entertain siya ng maraming tao at generally maganda naman ang ratings nya. money, kahit hindi bumabaha, pero this job really helped my family. stability, not only financially but emotionally, as well, dahil maganda ang naging experience ko, writing for the show. nakahanap ako ng bagong home. basta. sobrang nagpapasalamat talaga ko.

pero bago pa ko mag-emote dito kailangang bunuin ko muna ang 2 scripts na naka-assign sa kin for the final week. tight ang deadline. saturday ng hapon. when in my dreariest scripting days i would find myself on autopilot, ayokong mag-autopilot this time around. tutal last week na, gusto kong ibuhos na lahat. kahit maigsi ang timeframe na binibigay. hay.

grabe, 8 months. it just flew. halos di ko naramdaman. april nung sinimulan namin ang conceptualization. naaalala ko nung nasa ilocos ako, on holy week vacation, worrying about a storyline assignment concerning this project. naaalala ko yung 1st script na sinulat ko on pilot week, including the Love Scene that started it all. naaalala ko ang tamis ng unang halik. ang pigtails at first menstruation ni nene.

it was a different kind of rush. a different kind of fulfillment. maybe in a few years i would most likely be not as optimistic as i am now, but i'd like to enjoy this stage in my writing life for all that it's worth. after all, minsan lang tayo magiging infants. minsan lang tayo magiging bata. so i will let it soar.

* * *

the other night i saw er1k matt1's new film "the @rrival" at the ccp with friend beatlebum. taga-tv na ko kaya medyo naiilang na ko sa artsy crowd na nakahalubilo namin doon. haha. pero i was surprised to see so many familiar faces there. hindi rin naman pala napunta sa wala ang freelancing/indie-ing days ko, kasi wealth na ring maituturing yung mga taong nakikilala mo along the way. you never know baka one of these days kailanganin mo ang tulong nila. haha. user-friendly?!

pero masaya. refreshing. to see a film like that. it's far from perfect pero i liked it. i liked its honesty and unpretentiousness. i liked the simplicity of its protagonist. i liked the natural chemistry among the actors, the filmmaker's obvious love for the milieu in which he set the most of his story.

that night may dalawa akong ex-crushes na nakita. yung isa, siya pa ang naunang bumati sa akin (haha, big deal daw sa akin kung sinong nauna?!). sabi nya, "uy, parang kilala kita ah." five years ago, baka kinilig ako. pero marami nang blessings-that-came-a-little-too-late moments na dumaan over the past five years. parang gasgas na plotline na lang sa isang teleseryeng na-stretch beyond its original target run. kaya di na bago. pero worthy of a chuckle pa rin, hehe.

HAY. magsimula ka na, oy. puro ka chika.