sa sinusulat namin ngayon, may kaunting homage akong gustong gawin sa moments na lumilipas na worth i-immortalizing, lest you forget them and lose them forever. i used to call them my time capsules 10 years ago (time capsule #2 back then were memories i had of my then-suitor, now-husband). sa kwento namin ngayon, L calls them H@ppy M3m0ries.
naghalungkat ako sa archives and i realized i'd been keeping happy memory items since 10 or 11 years ago.
2005. brainstorms with beatlebum, frog princess, and floda for the kiligshow. cheapsteaks, IO, and especially for you. that was fun, and that time masyado akong busy sa funny-sad subplot ng real life to realize how fun everything else was. ha!ha!
2006. da big haus. the money was fun. and the work would've eventually become fun, too, probably, somehow, if i had stayed. i was miserable back then but looking back now, i'll always remember that racket. blowing out smoke in the balcony, stressing out in the control room, stressing out in the spotting room. working alongside osobear, cringing at his corny hirits. haha. he was so corny i couldn't help but laugh.
let me continue that.
2007. hmm. what? oh, yeah. MD@FI. the smell of the place. the cream walls. the lectures in that little room, the headaches that came after. and of course, the carpool gang. the laughter. the tears (oh, they did come, in the end). sa lahat ng yon, ang pinakatumatak for me were the carpool friendships. para kaming mga college kids. i was so happy then, i should've known, may equivalent na lungkot yun later.
2008. that movie. that compound. day in, day out. night in, night out. "hell" was the only word that would come to mind. i hated everything about that shoot. everything. i was literally smoking two packs of cigs a day. kung kaya lang lumuha ng dugo dahil sa dusa at sama ng loob, i would've bled to death. i hated that memory, and yet it was the most vivid memory of 2008.
but was it? nah. the most vivid memory was the Interrogation. but i think that happened on dec 27 or 28. so technically, that was 2007. ironically, it didn't register in me much. siguro kasi, sobrang sakit nya parang kinalimutan ko na lang yung detalye. i couldn't dwell on the memory, baka mabaliw ako. haha.
christmas 2008 was memorable, too. the Christmas of the Broke and Broken. iisang tao lang yun, ako. walang pera, basag ang mga pangarap, not knowing what the future would bring. but love had been there, love had made everything so much easier to bear. kaya nga hindi kita masyadong masakyan Leyang Maarte. kahit ako pa ang tumipa sa mga sinasabi mo at ginagawa mo. NABUBWISIT PA RIN AKO SA YO.
i would NEVER punish my osobear for the things that other people did to me. at least, not consciously. and not immediately.
pero hanggat walang sinasabi ang mga diyos. deadma sa lahat.
2009. katorse. aww. our afternoons in tierra bella, at our headwriter's house. a new career was born for me.
2010. giving birth. the way she looked when she first came out, 5 seconds old. i can still remember how long she'd been (around 11 inches?) and her torso was yellow brown. my beautiful daughter. the love of my life, a gift from the man that i love.
the civil wedding, ironically, didn't make a big mark. siguro kasi ang dami kong iniisip nung time na yon. (read: script DEADLINE) literally, i was like, ok, break muna. ikakasal lang ako. tapos pagkakasal, back to writing. haha. worst feeling in the world. you only get married for the first time once, and WORK gets in the way! haha. not complaining though. i've been very lucky, very blest with work. my family needs it and i'm forever grateful for the opporunities to earn.
dahil may dealdine pa, hanggang dito na lang muna. 2011 onwards. worht thinkng about.
No comments:
Post a Comment