bubog

naloloka ako sa additional zodiac sign. for 30 years i was a taurian. tapos ngayon aries na. eh for the longest time binabasa ko ang horoscope ko from susan miller. ano yon...all this time mali pala ang predictions nya sa akin, dahil hindi naman pala ako taurus?? but how can i explain those predictions that seemed right? tsamba??

nakakaloka. parang gusto kong magpakatigas ulo at pangatawanan ang pagka-taurian ko. typical taurian...matigas ang ulo. o yan! taurian talaga ko e!

i wanna be a billionaire, so freakin bad. kanta ko pa rin yan, despite the health scare two weeks ago. masaya ako dahil so far maganda ang recovery ng writer friend kong na-stroke. kaya back to i-wanna-be-a-billionaire mode na naman ako, gustong kuumayod to the max para matupad ang pangarap. hehe, as if naman magiging bilyonaryo ka sa pagsusulat. hindi nga, pero pwede. pwede ka namang yumaman. wag ka lang magkakasakit. yun ang masaklap.

i miss that dead old love. in a place where no one really knows where i came from. and i say nothing, because i wanted to start from scratch, i wanted to fall in love and spend my life with something new. pero ngayon bumabalik na naman yung dati kong nararamdaman. despite the heartbreak of years ago.

hindi pa ngayon. but someday, maybe i can go back to you.

busy days are here again

i'm starting to feel it, and i'm grateful. my only regret is that i get to have less time for my baby.but it's the sacrifice we'll have to make. para din naman sa kanya 'to in the long run.

thank you lord, for blessings. for good health. for love. for family.

matagal ko na namang alam 'to, pero there are two things i don't like doing: attending high-profile parties, and presenting a powerpoint pitch to the boss. nung isang gabi naggatecrash ako sa isang uber-sushal na party sa corinthian gardens and i didn't think i'd survive the night, antisocial that i am. but thank god, nasurvive ko naman...at nakakain pa ko ng uber-sarap uber-sosyal na foodam. hehe.

neurosis ko na yata to. i really wish i were more of a gregarious girl. ang hirap kayang maging seryosong mahiyain. some people who don't really know me well mistake my shyness for kasupladahan. mataray kasi ang hulma ng fez ko, at pag nahihiya ako o naiilang ako hindi ako masyadong ngumingiti o nagsasalita. maybe if i weren't so shy and serious, life would be a lot sunnier. and it would be easier to make new friends.

hay. masaya ko tonight dahil after three nights, i'm home before 9 pm for my baby and my bosobear. i'm going to bed early with my husband on my left and my baby on my right and wake up refreshed tomorrow. thank you lord.

audrey christie at five months

she can laugh now. giggle at "peek-a-boo".
she can lift her head when she's lying on her back as if wanting to get up.
she can turn on her side (pero di pa nya kayang tumaob mag-isa).

seasons are turning

you feel it in the air. parang kahapon lang, pasko pa lang. ngayon mid-january na. yesterday our baby was barely a month old. tomorrow she's turning five months.

january is bound to be busy, and it's starting. gotta earn my paycheck. even if it means working away from my child. walang exagg, pero mga nanay lang siguro makakaintindi ng pakiramdam nung moment na aalis ka ng bahay for work, and you're saying goodbye to your baby. ang bigat sa loob, kahit na sandali ka lang mawawala. kakalabas mo lang ng bahay, makakita ka lang ng ibang baby sa daan, you're instantly reminded of her at gusto mo nang umuwi.

aysie's binyag coming up in january. gotta make the arrangements for it. i've become a pleasant bore now, being a mom and wife and all. so far from the spicy little cynic that i was five years ago. ohwell. seasons are really turning, and you won't notice unless you really pay attention to the little details of every day.

worried but praying

a co-writer of mine suffered a stroke the other day. i was so rattled and worried for her especially these past two days, dahil ang unang balita, multiple-vein aneurysm daw. wala akong ibang ma-utter kundi the same short prayer--lord, please save her--dahil kaibigan ko ang co-writer kong ito and i couldn't bear the thought of worst-case scenarios. mabait ang diyos, dahil kahapon ng umaga nagising na sya and she seems lucid, and contrary to initial reports, single-vein aneurysm lang pala ang naganap. still, i keep praying. that she will get well, kahit na slowly but surely.

stress over a deadline, poor diet, sedentary activity. feeling ko yun ang nakadale sa kanya. right now naka-check ang two out of three items sa listahan ko. not much exercise, hungry hen ang drama ko these days. pero hindi pa dumarating ang stressful days, happy pa ang buhay sa ngayon, which is what i'm starting to fear. na baka pagdating ng panahon na ako naman ang sasabak sa ganong klase ng buhay, mahirapan ako nang sobra. to the point na magsuffer ang health ko.

hindi pwede, dahil kelangan pa ko ng anak ko. kelangan pang mabuhay nang matagal, kelangang laging healthy. kaya lord, okay na po ako sa balanseng buhay. di ko na po kailangang maging super yaman o super laki ang paycheck, kung kalusugan o buhay naman ang kapalit.