26 years old, NBSB, with all the time in the world

A blog posted by my 26-year-old self. I sounded like I was going through a somekinduva heartbreaking episode.

today i finish all the pending tasks. fold up everything from the last project. sleep this off or watch a good movie, eat something sweet or mag-"emote" sa isang sulok, cry it out if needed. haha. overdramatic. but i only have until today to get this outta my system. not healthy, to go through another beginning with baggage from the immediate past.

should i take that nap before i go out? catch the last days of narnia, or king kong? chocolate with peanuts, almonds, or some other nut? maybe i don't really need a crying session with myself. been through worse before, really. this is a pinch, compared to everything else from the past combined. 


In fairness, ang daming time ha? Haha. Those were the days when my time was all mine to spend. Single 26-year-old me. Wala pa ngang boyfriend (I met my first boyfriend and future husband, 2 months later!) .

Today, how would I deal with depression? Can't afford to do a lot of these things. Because at 3pm may daughter comes home from school, and we have to do homework or review for a test. I have me-time til around 7pm, if I don't have deadlines to meet. 8pm -10pm is Mama and baby time, and it's non-negotiable (or else you'll have a 6-year-old bawling, demanding time that's "due" her!). then at 1 am husband comes home, and unless there's work to do and I have to stay up, I'm compelled to go to bed at the same time as he does. Sleeping together (literally), has become a happy habit for us two, most of the time.

So yes, my time is no longer absolutely mine. But I'd like to think I'm happier. 1 million times happier than 10 years ago. Amused ako, realizing how the years have changed me. how, when placed in a similar situation, a 26-year-old NBSB girl would react differently from a 36-year-old married woman.

ang daming tumatakbo sa utak ko, sa totoo lang. just came from a work marathon and slept at 10 am. and there's still a lot of work to do. pero wala, namiss ko lang kausapin ang sarili ko. Aside from hanging out with friends, it's blogging and chronicling that I've done a lot less of these past 5 years.

so ganito na lang. i will list down the keywords. Then get back to them later.
- Dear P
- Dear Oso
- my newest favorite TV show
- alternate realities

for now, have to review my little girl for 2 long tests tomorrow.