officially obsessed with that other life

tell me. may kulang ba sa buhay ko at nagkakaganito ako?

kulang sa fairy tales, siguro. kulang sa thrill, maybe. pero definitely, hindi kulang sa pagmamahal. the grounded, real kind. 

nagpaalam naman ako. at alam nya. 

ang sabi ko sa kanya, "may alternate world ako. kaya kapag nakita mo akong nakatulala, alam mo nang nasa kabilang mundo ako." 

tinawanan lang nya. hindi nya sineryoso. may imaginary friend din daw ba ako na umiiyak ng kendi. 

eh kung alam nya lang. 

i've done this before, at 12 years old. spent my days and nights, dreaming my life away. 

it fuelled my passion, to write them all down. using an old typewriter. days and nights, clacking away. pasko, bagong taon, wala akong pinipili. i wanted to get it out of me, wanted to make that world real. it was more real to me than my actual world. 

nasaan na kaya ang mga sinulat kong yon? 

feverish. obsessed. that face has become the most beautiful face i've ever seen in that other life.