is that what you call this?

Stumbled upon this on the web.

http://galadarling.com/article/how-to-cope-with-a-quarter-life-crisis

"Most people who are going through this ugly process are aware that there is something wrong, but are you just feeling generally miserable or is it a quarter-life crisis?

What are the signs or symptoms? Commonly, they are…

*Feeling like you’re not doing well enough
*Frustration & disillusionment with the working world
*Feeling insecure about what you’re doing, where you’re going & what your plans are
*Anxiety over close relationships
*Feeling extremely bored with your social life (otherwise known as, “Oh my god, I will throw myself out the window if I have to go to another party at her house”)
*Nostalgia for teenage years, high school or university (this often manifests itself as an obsession with looking at old photographs or reading journals & reminiscing)
*Feeling a desperate need to “settle down” — like buy a house, get married or have a baby
*...Or conversely, wanting to “escape” the real world — like backpacking around the world or finding a nice cave to live in
*Financial stress or confusion
*Intense loneliness
*Feeling that everyone is doing better than you
*Terror at the concept of getting “old”
*Wondering “Is that all there is?”
*A vague feeling of apathy, mixed with horror, panic & depression

Of course, feeling some of these things occasionally is pretty much par for the course, & not necessarily indicative that you’re going through a quarter-life crisis! However, if all these things (or the majority of them) seem to have hit you at once, this can be quite terrifying — especially if it happens to coincide with your birthday or other milestone.

...There are two deciding factors which separate the two groups. Since they both deserve a lot of attention, I’ve split this article into two parts — the second of which is coming tomorrow.

The first catalyst for a quarter-life crisis is a lack of meaningful work.

So, the idea that your work or career (or lack of one) could be contributing to your feelings of anxiety is probably a bit of a drag to some of you — especially those of you who are in denial about how happy your work makes you. By now, we all know (I’m sure) that working just to eke out a living is not the path to eternal bliss. The people who seem happiest & most fulfilled are always those who do something that turns their crank. I know that sounds like a bit of a heavy trip, especially if you don’t feel like you’re part of that camp. Believe me, I’ve been there, & I know from personal experience that there is nothing worse than working in a job you dislike. I think the place where a lot of us stumble is that we think the work we do — or the career we enter — has to be life-changing, ground-shaking, life-shattering. It doesn’t. It doesn’t at all.

When I say “meaningful work”, my definition is that it has to be meaningful to you — & only you. As much as we would all like to change the planet, that isn’t necessary to feel good or fulfilled. My idea of something “meaningful” is pretty simple: do something that has value to you"

and i thought naghihinarte lang ako. umi-emo. for months now.
i suppose it's normal. abnormally normal, and it goes with the age bracket. dahil marami sa mga naka-bullet points above, swak. ganun pala ka-clinical. nabu-bullet point.

meaningful work daw. ano ba ang meaningful sa kin?
i'm lost.

at least i'm glad. it's not just me.