Saturday, November 26, 2005

jekyll-hide dialogue on a cranky night

3 am. i'm sitting on the railway tracks at the Sta. Mesa station, fighting off sleep and fatigue from the drastic change in the work schedule. the director is out of sight, huddled in some dark alley out there with the two kid actors. he's been motivating them for more than thirty minutes now--the longest he's ever done. ho-hum. right on front of me, by the by, the cinematographer and his team have been busy nitpicking on just about every shaft of light and shadowfall in this semi-noirish little nook that is the set. they've been at it for almost an hour now.

big yawn. what's with them? what's taking everything so long tonight?

before the radical transformation from Owl to Lark, i was a lot more comfy working at night. i used to be most alive between midnight and four pee-em. but now that I've come to be a Day Kind of Person i found myself getting a bit cranky last night. quietly cranky, but cranky still.

sigh.

and so i was split. like jekyll and hyde. and nobody even knew about it. haha.

Scenario 1: A couple of crewmen won't quit friggin making papampam.
Beeyatchy Me: T***a, I wish these crewmen would stop. Pag di to makuha sa tingin makakatikim talaga ang mga to ng salita e.
Rational Me: Umiral na naman ang OA na anti-sexist tendencies mo. Spare yourself of the ugly feelings. Ganyan lang talaga ang mga yan sa kahit sinong script con/production assistant/makeup artist na babae, but you know they're harmless naman.
Beeyatchy Me: (stubbornly) Basta. Nagtatrabaho ako, hindi ako nandito para lang barubalin ng mga sexist brutes na yan. (puts on tiger look)

Scenario 2: A setman has placed a prop in the wrong position.
Beeyatchy Me: Ano ba naman tong si (name of Setman), isasabit pa kami pareho sa continuity ng set. Dapat may teddy bear sa ibabaw ng bag e.
Rational Me: Kaya ka nga nandyan para bantayan yun e. And no one's perfect...most especially you.

Scenario 3: Director has forgotten to add an insert shot of an important detail in the scene.
Me: (to direk) Aren't you going to shoot an insert of the phonebook?
Direk: Oh...yeah! (to cinematographer) Wait, we have one more shot. (to me) Thank you.
Beeyatchy Me: (silently) Ano ba direk. Is this your first movie?
Rational Me: Again, kaya ka nga nandyan para magpaalala di ba. Is this your first movie?

Scenario 4: Current Crush's ex is hovering by the set.
Beeyatchy Me: I know it's totally irrational, but I don't like her.
Rational Me: You're right. It's totally irrational.
Beeyatchy Me: What did he see in her?!
Rational Me: Well let's see...1) she's got blonde hair, 2) she doesn't keep an out-of-touch/walled-in composure whenever he's around, 3) she treats him like a normal person, and 4) she knows how to make a guy feel special; i.e. flirt. she has everything you don't, poor loser.
Beeyatchy Me: Big deal. (surveys girl's seemingly hawk-like, Brit-Bitch stance) I still don't like her.
Rational Me: Oh, quit it. Get back to work.

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