oops, i'm at it again

* after my 8-month hiatus from the movies, i'm back on the field. and it may not pay much but it feels right. knock on wood. 3 days down, 24 to go. i'm praying that everything will go just the way they are...or even better!

* after several weeks of self-administered therapy, i'm singing those stupid, inane, mushy-as-hell, makes-me-wanna-kick-myself mymp songs again. this time around though, i'll let it die a natural death. experience has taught me two things about myself when it comes to feelings: 1) forced suppressions never work, and 2) these things, no matter how intense, never really last. outtasight, outtamind!

* i don't know what's the matter with me, but the coincidence is uncanny: it seems that with every movie project, i find myself retreating to the, er, Classic Little White Lie. and now i'm at it again. First day pa lang, i somehow managed to fib in front of a bunch of first-time co-workers that i'm blissfully in a relationship with someone. hahaha! what is wrong with me? not that i'm embarrassed about being single (far from it...wouldn't have it any other way kung di rin lang sa taong gusto ko), just that i've found out that proclaiming yourself as "taken" is a somewhat effective way to discourage unwanted attention from certain members of the opposite sex. and this time around, i guess it did.

* in this case, anyway, i didn't volunteer the "information". someone assumed that the picture (of me and a male friend) on my camphone was that of me and The Boyfriend. "gaano na kayo katagal ng boyfriend mo?" The Assumptioner asked in front of about half a dozen leering crewmen (i'm no raving beauty pero ganun lang talaga ang mga manggagawang lalake sa industriya ng pelikula pagdating sa kahit sinong manggagawang babae. proven and tested). now this Assumptioner had "unusual" vibes going on with him from Preprod Meeting 1 onwards ("Assumptionista" na rin ako, fine, but i think we all do sense these things). i was a bit appalled. so when he made the assumption that the guy in the picture was my jowa, found the opportunity to make a polite oblique brushoff: "nine months." i answered him, tongue-in-cheek, not meeting the eyes of anyone in the premises. hahaha. what he didn't know, really, was that the guy in the camphone pic was not only NOT my boyfriend, but NOT into the likes of me as well--he's gay. my ever-convenient "front", when circumstances call for one. hahaha!

* now i feel guilty about it. not only because i lied, but because i, er, used my gay friend without his consent. oh well. i'm sure he'll understand. haha.