dilutions and the narrowing that was

in favor of the vital, it's the trivial that's the first to go. it has to be that, or else you risk losing it both.

to balance out the intensity and the tendency-for-self-torment, i dilute myself in the commonest of ways.

sometimes, though, i do the diluting a little too much. it's not healthy anymore. to narrow life down to a specific aspect. i just have to think that i'm in a very special place right now, and it would be foolish to risk it just because i choose to enjoy diluting myself a little too much.

what did i say to myself three years ago? think broad, bluey. i've been adrift, in the dark, drowned out by own "dilutions". how narrow can someone's perspective be, to think of the same thing every single day, more than anything else, more than what you're really meant to do. it's foolish. foo-lish.

thank god i have this time off. to rest and think.

and tomorrow's another day. thank god for that.