Friday, June 23, 2006

D-day

i'm kinda depressed today because...

...i didn't get the new script bookbound this afternoon, and i'm running out of time. sunday's the shoot and i have to accomplish that bookbinding thing tomorrow.
...i can't eat what i want. been on a diet for the past six days. losing weight is a bit harder now than it used to be, what with me being sedentary and homebound most of the time.
...i'm bored. dunno why.
...i have translations to do, but i'm not in the mood to move my (fat, sorry) a$$ to do them.
...i feel bad about having to complicate the little white lie last night. complicate, meaning, having to use the same lie to a new person, just because The-Grouch-Who-Annoyed-Me-So-Much-In-Vietnam was in the same circle of conversation. i was cornered. will have to put a stop to this. will have to set up the Breakup soon. i'll say that he's been getting in touch with me less and less, that we've drifted apart after Vietnam, that he's probably nurturing something for somebody else. for all i know, it just might be closer to the truth than i could actually think.
...hearts get broken all the time.
...i just met a high school classmate (Grace Halo) who's getting married by the end of the year. huwaat.
...everyone's falling in love around me and here i am, forever languishing in subzero. brrr.
...i want to fall in love. with the right person. kaso mukhang nasa ibang planeta ata si Right Person. o baka naman hindi pa pinapanganak, o deadbol na. just my friggin luck. sa next life na lang siguro.
...i'm glad for the new project but there's a part of me that's holding back. the work is familiar territory, i've worked with some of the peeps in the staff, but somehow...i'm not as excited as i usually would be at the beginning of a new project. ewan ko. maybe it's just the jitters over having to acquaint myself with a new troupe, and coming into the project a week late. but i know the lord will guide me. as he always does.

hay. inane, inane. maybe it's just another one of those days. maybe i'll get to sleep soundly tonight and wake up happy tomorrow.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's post-project blues, I think.

You can't pour in so much care and attention to one thing for several weeks straight and not feel a bit of a letdown when it finally comes to an end.

It almost feels like you've lost your purpose, kasi nawalan ka ng focus.

Hopefully, things will feel better once you dive into the new project. :D

Plus there's no limit to the wonders that a good night's sleep can do. haha! ;-)

saffron_blue said...

more like pre-project blues. i wasn't given the chance to go through the post-project blues cause a new project came in almost immediately. not that i'm complaining, i'm happy about it, but three days to orient and prepare myself for the new project is shorter than what i've been used to. things are still sinking in. :-P

i hope i'd be over the adjustment period after the first shooting day...and that i'd be able to sleep better as well! ;-D